20 August 2019

Dear Diary,

Today has been a frustrating day and it’s not even over yet. At the start of today I had several confirmed sessions and one by one the cancellations started rolling in. It is frustrating because I was very much looking forward to taking some cock since I had to ditch on my last tour from being hurt.

Woke up at six o’clock with a stomach ache and spent an hour and a half tending to that little situation in the confines of my ladies room. Thank god for the Squatty Potty. Was planning on getting showered and ready for the day but then I started getting the cancellations and decided fuck it. Today’s going to be a sweatpants and t-shirt kind of day. I already told my PA she could work from home so she’s not coming to the office today and I have the whole house to myself. Tried to do some writing but I’m in too pissy of a mood and am being bitchy. When I want cock, I realllly want cock. Have too many work functions this week to spend time trying to match someone and honestly, fucking without getting paid doesn’t do it for me anymore. All those guys think they’re god’s gift to the world and I should be grateful to be fucking them. Doesn’t work like that. I much prefer the guys who worship me like the goddess I am and then fuck me like the cum slut I was made to be.

Had a super interesting conversation earlier with someone who was curious about how I got my “training” and after telling them they sent me a link to report crimes in GA like I’m going to report every family member who has had their dick inside me. Would make for a super fucking lonely Thanksgiving. I was talking about my mythical child (that I will never have cuz/barren) that I’d like to raise the same way I was and feel super judged…like - can I not have fantasies and talk about them to people anymore? What people don’t get about this is that in this fantasy, where I raise my mythical daughter in the same manner - I’m the daughter. This is about me and my needs, my wants, and what turns me on about my experiences. Most people who have family incest fantasies don’t want to inflict the same type of lifestyle on another generation (hello - childless/barren) but we thoroughly love reliving our own experiences. Full grown, well adjusted, thinking adults try very earnestly to NOT do things against the law. It’s a thing. (Well besides being a fucking whore but that’s totally different and should not be illegal).

Just finished making some pasta for lunch, and even though I don’t need it and should kill my frustration in the gym, I’m going to eat this entire fucking bowl covered in pesto sauce and then go take a bath. Hopefully grounding myself in some natural elements like epsom salt and water will help me lose the attitude and set my mind right to get some writing done today. If you feel a particular way about this please feel free to message me on snapchat.

Love, Casey